"God Bless My Sister"

Each night, during bedtime prayers, we say our prayers and then add in anyone else that we are praying for. We always pray for Bryce to be "happy, safe, and healthy." We have prayed for Leah even before we knew she was "Leah" and what her short, amazing life was going to be like. Since we lost her, we ask God to give her "BIG hugs and kisses" from us and that "we miss her and love her."

Well, tonight, our wise beyond his years 2 year old ended our prayers with "God bless my sister."

How simple. How sweet. What an amazing Big Brother. Somehow or other he just "gets it."

I was very worried back in the Spring and Summer about how much he really understood or what we exposed him to about Leah. I didn't want to ever do or say anything that would potentially "scar" him for life. I'm not sure really what we're doing or not doing..... But, in my opinion, I think he's doing okay. He knows that he has a sister, who lives in Heaven with Jesus, and who loves him very much. He snuggles and loves her baby blanket and bunny and loves them more than his own.

Tonight is the eve of Dec. 7th.... The day that Leah would be turning 9 months old. It seems that every time I've seen a baby lately and had the stupidity to ask how old they are.... The answer is always (or close to) the age that Leah would be. I saw the sweetest baby last week who was born only 3 days before Leah and she was sooooo sweet! Cooing, giggling, and very active. I know that because Leah was a "Little Person" that her development may not have been normal in all areas, but I wonder so often what her milestones would be. At this time of the year I stress myself out going shopping, seeing all of the holiday outfits,wondering which beautiful Christmas dress she would be wearing this year. I simply can't do it.

That being said, so far.... This time of year has gone by surprisingly well. I was not really sure how we'd do with Thanksgiving this year, since it was the week before Thanksgiving that we got Leah's initial diagnosis (achondroplasia - dwarfism) and had the amniocentesis done. The Monday after Thanksgiving was when it was confirmed (thanatophoric dysplasia - fatal dwarfism). We had a very mellow, low key, Thanksgiving Day at our house with just the 3 of us and it was perfect. The actual week of Thanksgiving was kind of hectic, but I think God did that on purpose... To help keep my mind on my husband and son and to keep me from losing it! He really does look out for us.

I have a few great stories to share of others who have remembered Leah and hopfully will get the time to write those soon and well as share her pictures..... Finally, I know..... They're coming. I promise!!

"God bless all of the people that continue to keep us in their prayers. God bless all of the Mommys and Daddy's that have tough decisions to make and whose babies/children need our love and prayers. And most of all, God bless my amazing son who keeps us going each and every day and has the biggest heart of anyone I know..... And God bless Baby Leah."

PS: I asked Bryce today what he wanted for Christmas. He said "cookies. Football cookies." (Weird, because he doesn't eat cookies.) I asked him why he wanted cookies and he responded, "So I can share them with Daddy!!" (Oreo makes football cookies and are Daddy's favorite!) I had to leave you all with a smile:)